Blogs, I suppose, should be sort of fun and interesting. If you have lots of pretty places and things to take pictures of, blogs are a way to share them. If you have warm stories and projects in the works or completed, you can share them, too.
I try, but often fail, to not let this blog devolve into a septic mess of grievance and wailing and tears. But my life is my life.
I am inexpressibly sad and hopeless and at sea right now. Not suicidal --- let's get that out of the way. But I am low. I have been sitting in this spot on this couch all day and doing nothing. Literally not a single thing. Just sitting here. Staring at nothing. Rising only to take Tap out. The weight of this gloom will not let me move, or come up with a reason to move. I don't have many days left in my life, and this is how this onc has gone. Sheesh.
3 comments:
Take a look or a listen to this TED talk
https://www.ted.com/talks/adam_grant_how_to_stop_languishing_and_start_finding_flow
(I used the handy button to read the transcript instead of listening)
It's for those of us who are in the place that you have described so well. I don't know if it helps you to know that others are in the same place but it did me. Languishing. I hope you can find a way to move to another place even if only for a while.
Forgive yourself for today. I did that yesterday (forgave myself for wasting a day). And maybe--have one thing to do tomorrow that brings you joy.
I have those days more often than not. I always tell myself that as long as I'm not suicidal, and willing to share that I'm not in the best of moods, it can't be that bad.
So take it easy and just know that we get it. And it's [sadly] part of our lives. And if you are going out with Tap, you are directly making one other creature's life enjoyable.
Baby steps, you know?
Post a Comment