Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Ten Things

Ten Things You Can Do To Be Supportive When Someone Dies

1.  Listen.
2.  Let them cry.  Cry with them.  Tears help.
3.  Listen.
4.  Let them be quiet when they need to be.
5.  Listen.
6.  Let them lead.  This is their grief, not yours.  It will unfold as they need it to.
7.  Listen.
8.  Don't be afraid to smile.
9.  Don't say, "I'll do anything to help you," if you don't mean it.
10.  LOVE THEM.  Word and deed.  LOVE THEM.

2 comments:

kathy b said...

Sadly you know too well how to help.

shspark said...

You have nearly nailed the Jewish view on helping the mourner. Jewish mourners are supposed to have a forced 1 week period of mourning where friends, family and community surround them nearly the whole time, but are not supposed to speak to the mourner unless the mourner feels the need to speak. They are there help with daily activities. They are there to listen, to laugh, to show love, to share memories and to cry with the mourner. It is very cathartic and a way to process through the shock and grief.

Look. . .

Someone (and you know who you are) said that my lion looks like a bear in a veterinary Elizabethan collar. And now I can't unseen it.